How to Spot INFP: 9 Signs You’re Talking with One

Whether you wanted to make friends with an INFP, or are intrigued with how they live, it could be quite a challenge to find these free spirits in real life. Not only that they are one of the rarest personality types in Myers-Briggs 16 personalities, but they’re also the type who purposely go in hiding. Really!

At the same time, an INFP may be right under your nose but you’re not aware of it. Did I mention, INFPs can act out a different personality when they wanted to? Yes, they do, so you have to be keener to identify one.

But worry not. To guide you on spotting an INFP, here are a few signs you can watch out for:

How to Spot an INFP

Important disclaimer: I’ve made a list of some observable traits and actions of INFP. But remember, INFPs are unique individuals who vary in experiences, beliefs, and motivation. The following signs on the list may or may not be applicable to all INFPs.

Another important disclaimer: The list below only includes traits and characteristics INFP express outwardly. INFPs offer so much more when you get to know them, but if you wanted to spot them in a crowd or your group of friends, these are some signs you can look out for.

So, how do you spot an INFP in the sea of diverse personalities? I’ll tell you 9 signs you should consider in locating an INFP:

1. INFP fashion: They either are expressive or don’t care at all.

INFPs have either a distinct fashion – or no fashion at all (sorry, INFPs). I’m one of these kindred spirits so I’m pretty sure about how our preferences on fashion work. 

INFPs have 2 approaches in their clothing style: 

  • Their fashion expresses their interests.

Younger INFPs tend to be expressive in what they wear. Funny enough, I guarantee INFPs have an unconventional fashionable “phase” and dress up based on their interests – whether it’s rock, punk, goth, anime, or dress up like a character from a movie. 

I mentioned this, but surely, if INFPs are currently in their fashionable phase, it might be challenging to narrow them down as an INFP. Chances are, we could mistake them as ISFPs. 

However, the second fashion approach is much more very INFP.

  • They wear modest clothes and exude an earthy vibe.

As INFPs mature and start jobs, their fashion sense dissolves a bit and evolves into an earthy, modest, and simple style.

Moreover, INFPs don’t follow the fashionable trend. They don’t opt for shiny, dangling accessories, and hardly put on makeup. Such inclination to natural beauty and simplicity makes INFPs attractive, though.

They wear plain attires rather than glamorous ones to avoid standing out. While others would prepare their outfits days before the party, INFPs prepare 3 hours before the event and wear the first thing they grab from the wardrobe. And usually, they are the personality type who doesn’t follow the party’s motif – guilty here – possibly because they don’t necessarily need to impress anyone in the said gathering.

(Disclaimer: Some INFPs can be trained for fashion, especially when their job requires them to do so. But I must say, they still dress modestly.)

2. Naïve and childlike, but also are old souls.

INFPs have an amazing duality of being both naïve and mature. Innocent and childlike, new things and ideas excite the kid in INFPs. But while they’re a child at heart, they can turn 180 degrees to being an old soul.

People would realize how wise, independent, and nonconformist INFPs are after a few interactions.

They are reserved but rarely peer pressured. They’re in pursuit of peace and know when to set their foot in, and when to step out. They know how to protect their well-being.

3. Having to ask them the “are you alright” question.

“Hey, are you alright?”
“Maj, you okay?”

Three hours into the party and my friends already started asking me if I was alright. Although INFPs enter the party excitedly, too much stimulation and small talk will wear down their batteries. They become quiet and unresponsive.

Unlike INFJs who can withstand their exhaustion to accommodate their friends, INFPs, on the other hand, still fall into the lot of authenticity and will unconsciously show their disinterest. With that forced smile and faint chuckle, boredom is written all over their face.

Remember the gentle person you often ask if they’re okay. There’s a possibility, this free spirit is an INFP.

You may also like: 5 Signs Introverts Need Alone Time from the Bustling World

4. They don’t look directly in the eye.

Most INFP finds it hard to make eye contact. If I’d be honest, I feel hazy within the millisecond of looking at a person’s eyes. There’s a short mental block and I’m not exaggerating.

So instead of making eye contact, INFPs look at other person’s mouths or listen intently while darting their eyes on the ground. 

5. INFPs have a shy, squishy smile.

As Fi-users, INFPs usually have a shy, adorable, squishy smile. Also, when they speak, they transition from smiling to not smiling very quickly. In comparison, Fe-users often display a wide, brimming smile.

Tom Hiddleston and Johnny Depp are popularly typed as INFPs. And I believe INFPs exude the same aura whenever they are smiling.

6. They are gentle and patient but aren’t pushovers.

INFPs are laid-back, gentle, and – let’s say it – looks weak. However, you can tell they are INFP when these sensitive, gentle, and kind spirits know how to reject an idea.

Their no means NO. And when you challenge their beliefs, they could run a tirade of reasons why they are more right. While they are gentle, they won’t let anyone step on what they believe in.

7. INFPs are gigglers.

Witty puns and unanticipated jokes would have INFPs rolling for hours. For INFPs, quirky jokes replay over and over again in their heads, and they still chuckle even when everyone has moved on.

Even I easily giggle at my own random thoughts. Honestly, I scare myself sometimes when I laugh alone. INFPs would also replay comedic skits just to laugh with the same intensity for the nth time. Their laughs sometimes become uncontrollable.

Search for the earthy, quiet person who can burst out a carefree laugh. INFPs respond hilariously to wit. This may also be the reason why INFPs don’t become effective comedians. They laugh hard even before saying the punchline!

8. Always adoring the sky and nature.

As you walk under the starry night sky, INFPs are the first ones to point out how beautiful the clouds and the moon are. You’d be talking about your life, but INFPs won’t miss pointing out how beautiful and mysterious nature is. 

9. INFPs are sleeping bears.

Have you witnessed a laid-back, avoidant, and reserved acquaintance explode with unanticipated and unwavering anger? If yes, then that person’s probably an INFP.

INFPs are extremely patient and can let insults slide. But when their anger bucket reaches the limit, they’re literally like sleeping bears who wake up to attack perpetrators.

They become the most insensitive and frank people who may retaliate with violence. However, it would very rare for an INFP to reach this stage. But if such rage from a peace-revering fellow catches you by surprise, you might consider investigating on their personality more. They might be INFPs.

Related Post: INFP Rage: How Do INFPs Show Anger?

Where do you spot INFPs?

To narrow down your search for INFPs, here are the most possible locations to find them:

  • Book stores

Do I have to explain this? Of course, many INFPs are voracious readers. I, myself, spend hours finding good fiction books from a book sale. 

  • Library

When alone, INFPs would opt to stay in their peaceful bubble inside libraries where being quiet is normal. 

  • Craft stores

Find INFPs gliding through the colorful artsy shelves. See them taking their time along the art, notebook, and crafts aisle. When they’re in a department store, they sure lock their eyes in on the craft section.

  • The Internet

Other than home, the Internet is where INFPs feel most free. It’s hard to spot INFPs in real life, but a breeze to connect with them through social media, forums, and comment sections.

Indeed, it’s hard to find INFPs and will require keen observation. If you’re interested to know whether a friend of yours is an INFP or not, why not let them take the free personality test?

M.Mathias


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